47 Year Old - 7 Year Old

Several years ago, I posted an article titled the “47 year old– 7-year-old”. These are ‘adults’ that act like 7-year-olds when they have a challenge:

“it’s not my job… (throwing both of their hands up)”

“It’s not my responsibility or I didn’t do it… (pointing their fingers both ways)”

“look what they did…and now I suffer the circumstances”

They would rather talk behind others backs, than approach them directly

I wanted to illuminate a societal trend, a challenge to be solved. I want to challenge those that witnessed this decline to take a stand with me and begin holding themselves, and others accountable for their behavior. Dov Seidman's book nails it: "Why, How we do anything means everything", he says, "...Today, how we behave and interact with others is the ultimate differentiator. The qualities that most once thought of as "soft" - integrity, passion, humility and truth - have become the hard currency of business success and the most powerful driver of reputation and profitability."

Today society suffers from an all-time low in trust because of the decline in our social skills. The behavior that is being cultivated is that it is easier to Tweet about an issue you have with someone, than it is to talk with them directly, hence indirectly fertilizing the Tweeter's victim mentality. How we treat others is exactly how they will treat us. I see many of the critical social skills eroding in our society primarily because,

1. These skills are no longer being demonstrated or taught by the adults (the generation that did teach these skills are disappearing)

2. Proliferation of personal electronics. Loneliness today is increasing expontentially.

3. Social media

These three breed a “me-me-me”, “I-I-I” culture and not one that supports and builds a strong and vibrant society. A selfish culture is one that will collapse every time, just check the history books.

Mr. Seidman said it well that ‘integrity, passion, humility and truth’ are differentiators in todays society. Without these skills, society will continue to go down the ‘easy’ road.

This societal trend is a solvable challenge, and it has two heads:

1. Those adults behaving like children don’t know they are

2. These same adults don’t have the social skill set, the tools, to solve their problems like adults

The solution to the challenge will involve consistent effort from those of us that want to leave this world a little bit better. It will require us to ‘stand up and step out’, to live by those traits and teach those traits that Mr. Seidman speaks of, amongst others.

This is the time to nip this trend in the bud and make a positive difference in our circle of influence. This is the time, to help the 47 year old– 7-year-olds identify their adolescent behaviors and assist them in developing the tools they need to process their problems/issues as adults, not 7-year-olds. Now is the time to demonstrate those traits by living them for the younger generation to witness.

Stand up and step out with us to make a positive difference in our generations to come.

One of my favorite sayings is, “What you do speaks so loudly, that I cannot hear what you say”. Your example of actually living these traits, speaks volumes to those you influence. When you want to teach these traits, use words if you must.